Monday, December 22, 2008

That Holiday Spirit

I am very aware of the abundance of blog material regarding the holidays, stress, family, money, etc., but I cannot pass up the opportunity to share the what I consider to be the true bane of the Christmas season - TRAFFIC. My first observation is that there are lots of folks out driving around that normally aren't and probably shouldn't be, i.e., the senile ones. I have personally observed some fairly spectacular and terrifying maneuvers firsthand, and include, but are not limited to, driving the wrong way on a one way street, backing down a ramp in a parking garage, executing a 247590234750973406 point turn in the middle of a major thoroughfare and the always popular stopping a green lights. I try really really hard not to go nuts and scream when confronted with these situations because after all, it IS Christmas plus I have a pretty soft spot for older people that usually keeps my rage in check.

However, although the senior set is pretty much absolved of guilt in my book, there is another group who isn't. You know who they are. Those who won't let anyone over, who snake parking spaces (their time is soooo much more important than yours, you know), who ride your butt while you are doing the speed limit in a neighborhood and who generally seem to have forgotten that EVERYONE is busy, hectic and overwhelmed at this time of year. The meanies are out in force! Drew Carey has a joke about work that I love which could easily be appropriate for the holiday insanity and it goes something like this: “Oh, you hate your job (insert Christmas craziness here)? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.” My point is that just like most other things about life, we are all in it together, so sit in your traffic, run your nine million errands, hate your family get togethers and spend your money you don't have just like the rest of us losers. Get over it and stop driving like an asshole.

Parting thought that I stole from a friend just now while on the phone: "I need to hang up so I can use both hands, I mean both fingers." Makes you feel kinda warm and fuzzy, doesn't it? Merry Christmas Everyone!

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