Friday, June 28, 2013

Apparently I'm A Hot Mess

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about my time at the Grit anniversary party. The next afternoon, Grit had some fun pics up from the get together and I enjoyed looking through until I saw the one I'm in. Aside: yes, you are allowed to end a sentence in a preposition. I know, I was just as shocked as you are right now.  Anyway, when I got to that pic, my first thought was, "Dear GAWD why hasn't someone talked to me about my hair?! Holy crap that stuff is a mess." And while we all are our own worst critic, last weekend I got another dose of reality.

Last weekend, my daughter and her friend wanted to hang out, and I wanted to get out and stretch my legs some, so we decided on a stroll near the Battery etc. About ten minutes into our walk, a clap of thunder rang out so loud that I'm pretty sure I levitated and may have peed my pants a little too. We raced back to the car and reworked our plan. The girls, who are both 11, decided that we needed to go to King Street and window shop. We started at Forever 21, which blows my mind with the sheer quantity of stuff that is in there. Made our way down King to a few random places and eventually ended up back at Charleston Place. Wanting to cool off a little, we meandered through there too.

Here is where things went south. The girls decided somewhere along the line that they were going to "style" me and were playing this game in several of the places we went into on King. I heard whispered pieces of conversation from my daughter about how "she never buys anything, she thinks she doesn't look good in anything, she doesn't like to shop" etc which stung a little but were passed off rather easily, as she is in the throes of tween-dom and lives and dies by TV shows like What Not to Wear, Fashion Star, etc, so I didn't give it much thought.

This game continued as we went into a store in Charleston Place that is actually one of my favorites. Another aside: I have to dress business casual all week long and I have horrific arthritis in my feet. Typically on the weekends I have on little to no makeup and exercise clothes. This past Sunday was no exception to this pattern, and I was planning on a fair amount of walking, so you can imagine what I looked like. Pony tail, hat, workout shorts, sneakers, a v-neck tee and minimal makeup. The very nice salesperson greeted us and asked if she could help, and I told her about what the girls were up to and that we were just poking around. She persisted a little, and then asks me, "Soooo...would you say your style is uhh, (looks at my now sweaty and rumpled ensemble) casual?"

Ouch.

So then, because I'm me, I then felt the need to explain that Ihavetodressupallweekcasualontheweekends blah blah blah etc. Then I bolted. By the time we got home, the girls had decided that they were going to give each other makeovers (which means painting on ridiculous amounts of makeup) on each other and then they were going to share giving me one too. Awesome. They were extremely impressed with my collection of eye shadow which was cool because they are getting to the age where nothing that an adult does is cool any more. And it really was kind of fun watching them slap on the war paint but I was a little worried about the safety of my eyes given the way they were wielding the make up brushes. Yet we all emerged unscathed and looking somewhat reasonable. I thought I was off the hook until they broke into my closet.

Then the whispering cranked up again.
My daughter's friend: she has SO much clothes! My daughter: yeah, but she never wears any of it. She wears the same five dresses all the time. Friend: why? Daughter: same reasons that she never buys anything. My mom never really does anything with herself.

Double ouch. Like, a lot.

I kind of understand what she was saying but I kind of don't. I thought I did my hair (apparently not according to that damn picture) and I know I put on makeup. I do wear my summer dresses constantly because I am hot natured and am an outside sales rep, which means lots of in and out of the car. During the summer that can get, well, gross, if you don't take care with the wardrobe so I aim for as cool as possible. Plus I'm not super charged up about fashion in the first place, and my hair is challenging - thick, long, wavy/curly/coarse. I'm also not made of money, but I want to look nice and be cute and all that.

Not sure how to bridge this gap because it does appear that I'm not exactly knocking 'em dead, but I also am not interested in spending tons of time and dollars on my appearance. Where is the line between those things? Anyone? I need input and suggestions! Shopping secrets? Is my give a damn busted? I don't know...help me, anyone, everyone who knows about this!

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2 comments:

Tia said...

Oh I am so in this same boat...except that I live in Upstate SC and only have a 1 year old daughter (who I'm sure in about 10 years will say the same thing about her mother's lack of style...). I am a lifeguard/swim lesson instructor/swim team coach, and I wear the same exact thing every day to work. As in, a bathing suit and t-shirt and shorts....every day. So, on the weekend days that involve leaving the house, you'd think I'd wear something other than jeans/shorts/yoga pants and a t-shirt. I sometimes wear a dress, but I'm still nursing though, so I have to accommodate for that AND the 95% humidity in 85-95 degrees. (It's been "cooler" this summer because of the rain.) So I have a great selection of khaki and jean shorts that look relatively presentable with lower-cut lightweight t-shirts.

But I realized the other day that I really only look in a mirror while I'm brushing my teeth (and who cares what you look like while you're brushing your teeth, right?) and while I'm nursing my kid in the Ergo carrier in public to check to see how much side boob is exposed (usually none, but I'm still self-conscious about it).
I really need some help. Why doesn't my boyfriend say something?

bereccah5 said...

I suspect he thinks you probably look just great is why. I have come to the conclusion my spouse wouldn't notice what I was wearing unless my head wasn't attached anymore or something. The mom fashion thing is tricky indeed, throw in the swimming, nursing and humidity and you definitely have a challenge! Thanks for coming by!