Wednesday, November 21, 2012

The UnThankful Thanksgiving Post

So because I'm kind of well, contrary, I have a real problem with emoting on command. Which means that this whole state what you are thankful for every day thing really just brings out the worst in me. I AM grateful for many things, but I just can't help it that there are things that no matter how you spin it, I am just not thankful for. I guess I have oppositional defiance or something because feeling like I should feel a certain way only makes me want to rebel. Sigh. Oh well, let's just add it to my list of disorders and move on.

I've decided to create a list of things I am not thankful for in order to try and get it out of my system before tomorrow.

Stretch marks. There is just no way I will ever be thankful for those. I know they are a product of bringing my beautiful, brilliant and amazing children into this world but still. Do not like.

Psoriasis. Yes, I have the heartbreak of it. And let me tell you, it is amazing! Not.

"What's for dinner?" Every. Single. Night. of my life. Why do they always need to keep eating?!

Body hair. While I AM thankful that I'm no Sasquatch, seriously, after twenty five years of shaving my legs, I'm over it.

Justice. That store the devil's handiwork and I am positive that the people who work there will turn up with some sort of cancer from all those plastics and dyes and chemicals etc. And of course, my daughter cannot get enough of it.

"Moooooom! Sibling X did Y to meeeee!" If I NEVER hear this again, it will be too soon. Not thankful for that.

"Where is the ...?" Why am I supposed to be the location knower of all things? I can barely keep up with myself!

PMS. This really needs no explanation. It truly is just not a good scene for anyone.

Fennel. I just don't like it. I've tried and tried, but it's just, ew.

Black Friday. You will not change my mind on this, so don't even try.

Come on, play! What are you NOT thankful for? Tell me in the comments!

PS. It's official. I am turning into Maxine.

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Angela Race Drake said...

I don't seem to get the "Where's the..." question anymore. I figured out that "Where's the ... " always translated to: "Will you get ... for me?" My response to "Where's the..." has turned into "Have you looked for it?" and now no one asks.
I am NOT thankful for friends who start direct sales businesses who sell the "most amazing items" that you can't find in a store but are marked up 80% to make a profit out of my friendship with them. (OUCH! that sounds mean, but really? $75 for an embroidered purse?)

Number Whisperer said...

Gray hair!

Alison said...

I feel the same way about fennel. Seeds, the top part (fronds, maybe?), or the stalk part--hate 'em all. This is the main reason I don't care for Italian sausage.

bereccah5 said...

Oh yes, that too. I am fortunate that mine is still not noticeable, but it's coming.

bereccah5 said...

oh my word - YES. I tell people when I get the invites that I will be happy to eat their food and drink their tasty adult beverages, but the likelihood of me buying anything is about zero, so they are welcome to un-invite me if they want to ask someone else in my place. Otherwise, I'm just there to socialize. ;-)